There is a beast in man that should be exercised.
"There is a beast in man that should be exercised, not exorcised" -Dr. Anton Szandor LaVey-
This is one of my favorite quotes, as its very true in two ways. First of all, we need to live out our desires, even our most secret ones, for as far that this doesn't break any laws, hurt children or animals. But mostly people are fascinated by things, which are seen as taboo by society. For example, we can think of any fetish, Bdsm or further.
Why keep struggling with these hidden feelings and desires? Live them out to the fullest and rise above the limitations of your life. As such you will become much stronger and come closer to self deification. The best example I can show you is Sutekh, who wasn't held back by men or even god made limitations, to rise above all around Him and become the being of Chaos and Rebirth. Not into any fluffy and spiritual afterlife, but in true sense, here on earth.
Closer to our modern days, we have Carl Gustav Jung, who learns us, to look inside, to the things we hide away from others & many times even ourselves, and accept these things as essential parts of our being. If we don't accept these shadow aspects of our self, we will remain a limited being, always bowing for the demands of others and on a road of self destruction.
Because always living to the demands of others around us, family, organised religion & society in general, we can't deal with our shadow, and as such only get frustrated. And usually this is a vicious circle, only bringing us down, instead of up.
So stop with this self destruction and deal with your feelings and desires, you will feel much better doing what you want, then always listening to those around you. If it's not accepted to those who give you advice, don't tell them. That the easiest way, and soon you will be strong enough to stand up to the people that hinder you and even when you inform them, this will aid you in your growth, for people that only hinder you in your growth and way of life, don't need to be close to you. Dump them and set your feet firmly on the path of Sutekh, towards deification.
A second way, we can look at the above mentioned quote is in calling the energy of the gods you honor. It doesn't matter if you see them as true beings or archetypes. Call down the energies that are connected with the gods and feel them going through your being, strengthening you and giving you insights on the Left Hand Path.
Calling down the powers, can be done in many ways. Through ritual, meditation, but also in dance and many other possibilities. The only limitation is your fantasy.
When I call upon the power of Sutekh, I visualize how this flows to and through me, remodeling myself after His Image, becoming a god in His name. When doing this, I feel a enormous power flowing from the universe towards me, it can be as a kind of electricity, but also be a sexual feeling. I happens that I feel strong vibrations in my body and that my limbs will shake, as out of control.
Don't be afraid of this, but explore the numerous possibilities and feel the power of the gods in you, as they use you as a vessel and fill you with their strength.
If this happens to a christian, people quickly call a priest and say the person needs to exorcised. Strange enough in many other culture they see this as a blessing, not as a curse. For example think of shamans, possession in santeria and in animistic rites.
So step out of yourself, or at least the person that has been created by your tutors, family and society in general, live your life to the fullest and become a god in your own right. You will see a multitude of changes to grow, while others will talk of sin and devil worship. Don't let other control your life, but take over control and become who you really are deep in you.
And in all bless and thank the energies, Archetypes and Gods that aid you on this path, as I say thank you to Sutekh, my Benevolent Father, who shows me a multitude of ways to live a life, i never could dream of, before I found His Sinister Path and Power.